so its friday and that means its time for another confessional thingy. it is for real a great way for me to hone in on some of my random thoughts and put them somewhere other than my brain thingy. the glamazon plays host to this thingy and if you wanna be cool like me, the glamazon, and a host of others, i suggest you link up and join the thingy. for the record, i am the lone male confessional contributor and i dont know exactly why i added that but i did so whatever....
1. im feeling especially scrambled today. today my brain is similar to that of a meal served at cracker barrel. i get enamored with a word, made up or not, and just use it for no reason other than i cant think of the word fast enough im meaning to use. today that word is 'thingy' if you cant already tell. while rushing about the house, i asked my wife, 'when are you going to go get those thingy's?' to which she replied, 'you mean your kids?'...dont judge me
2. we're leaving for texas today in about 45 minutes and i just got done packing about 5 minutes ago. i think its because im a lazy packer and like a good challenge ya dig. sheesh, i mean anyone can pack over a 3 day period, but it takes real skill to pack a weeks worths in a rush....also, i apologize for the rushed performance today. i wont have much time to look over this post and i rarely do anyway.
3. i was once told by some bible thumper crazy that 'sheesh' is a 'bad word'. i forget the reasoning he gave but that was mainly because i was busy tuning him out practicing my curse words in my head.
4. i think i was about 11 when i first felt the sizzle on my lips from using my very first curse word. i stopped for a little bit a few years back but then realized that it was too much fun to use in the right context....and that context being everyday
5. i write the phrase 'i mean' alot to preface something im about to say. although i dont really say it as much as i write it. go figure.
6. justin baby-bib's song is still stuck in my head thanks to my kiddos. i blame them for my frustration because if it wasnt for them i wouldnt know who he was. although i must say they are also responsible for me actually liking the high school musical movies and as an added bonus, i also get to frequent chuck e cheese without looking like a freak so i think we're even.
7. eating contests sicken me.
8. i use oil of olay face wash and face cream. i used to borrow my wife's but then got tired of me stealing her stuff. so now i purchase it but i act like its for her at the register if i think they're looking at me sideways.
9. i hate actually talking on the phone. it is torturous and even my elbows get annoyed by being in that position. after about 5-6 minutes im looking for ways to get off the phone. i wonder how hard it would be to disable the talking feature all together?
10. i am extremely happy to report that chelsea handler's stand up was hilarious and relieving. i say relieving because a while back i mentioned how much i disliked everything flip flops, sandals, etc on MEN and guess what she said during her standup....thats right dammit!! she said she also hates flip flops on men!! thank you chelsea handler for validating my hatred. i really cannot explain why i dont like them other than the sloppy factor. in my opinion of course. i seriously have to focus in when someone is wearing them and they catch my attention. i get sidetracked that easily. i mean if Jesus visited me in a 'burning bush' like fashion and told me of his divine plan to save humanity or something, i could see myself interrupting and being like '....uhhh excuse me Lord, but could you do me a solid and put on some nikes or something? it would really help me focus and get humanity saved.'
9 comments:
LMAO!! U are soo funny!!!!
I too hate talking on the phone.. I screen my calls like nobodys business! bahaha!
Can someone tell me what song Justin sings? I'm beyond out of the loop.
I hate flip flops even on 18 year old glamor girls! Flip flops are ugly. So are Uggs. What are people thinking? I hate the phone unless I'm bored. Then I even call wrong numbers to engage somebody in conversation.
Sheesh a bad word??? That is what my aunt calls me. "hey Sheesh." Happy Birthday Sheesh" Maybe all these years she has been calling me a bad word, and I didnt even know it???hmmm.....sidenote, I used to use the oil of olay, but then I tried this stuff that they sell at Target, Its No.7 made by Boots, and that cream is the shnit!! much better than oil of olay, so next time you are out buying lotion for your wife, you should snag some for her...wink wink.
Justin Bieber is awesome. I feel like a cougar that way...oh well. Your flip flop phobia is odd, but oh well...we all have quirks. My husband used to steal my Clinique fashwash and moisturizer until I started buying his own. Packing...I get that. I'm going out of town in about 2 hours for the weekend and I haven't packed a thing. Have a happy random weekend!
1) "Kid Thingys!" Priceless.
2) It's not procrastination Sammy. I've done a personal scientific study (mostly cuz I do the same thing), and I've discovered that when you pack under pressure, you usually focus better because it's a must-do situation. Don't sweat it. You're in good company.
3) Just don't ever say "gyp." Trust me on that.
4) I second the motion dammit.
5) This line intentionally left blank. I mean, you know.
6) You're weird.
7) I have only two words for you: Takeru Kobayashi.
8) Coward. You probably do that with tampons too.
9) Me too. I pace, but at least that's good exercise.
10) Whatever you do, don't come to Florida then.
LOVE ya, Sammy. Awesome confessional.
PS: My word verification is "dessi," the name of our recent cruise dining room Maitre 'D. Cool.
THAT was funny. I'm totally intrigued that you're a guy blogger on here, I don't come across many. So hooray, someone new to follow. Thanks for a good laugh.
But, I am super sorry about your flip flop hatred, 'caue really, i couldn't function without them. Closed toed shoes make my feet HURT!
And finally, your kids are super cute.
I remember the day that my cousin told me that if you swore, but did your fingers in "air quotes" when you said it, then it meant you were quoting people and it didn't really happen. So, at dinner that night, when i turned to my dad and said "Pass the potatoes you 'bastard'-you can imagine how well that went over.
Ah, I feel ya on the swearing thing. I would get on a swearing spree, then stop, then start again...and really, I shouldn't, because I have kids and all. So I don't swear with anyone else around, but when hubby comes home at night I swear like a sailor. because, truly, a well-placed cuss word can take a story from funny to snorting a drink out your nose hilarious.
Oil of Olay, huh? I think that was my favorite confession yet. Seriously. Maybe if we meet one day we could go for mani pedis or maybe braid each other's hair :)
Thanks for playing, my token male follower.
PS-The book I read by Tolle was The Power of Now-totally loved it, totally frustrated I wasn't able to change as quickly as I wanted to :)
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