Monday, July 27, 2009

i hate drama

long story short, in general, people suck and are to be avoided at all costs. because people suck, generally speaking that is, i dont trust alot of people and honestly i dont forgive well either. thats another story for another time mainly because i can already feel myself getting pissed again!

theres 7 things i know of that 'fix' me right up when i get pissed or aggravated. this list is:

1. 'relations'
2. 'relations'
3. talking about 'relations'
4. thinking about 'relations'
5. randomly blogging
6. peanut butter and jelly sandwiches
7. and combining #'s 1-4 of this list and possibly #6...dont ask

so because only #'s 4, 5, and 6 can be...wait, SHOULD be done with kids in the vicinity, randomly blogging will have to do...what time is bed time again??

having said that, i havent posted in a while but that doesnt mean my dome hasnt stopped functioning abnormally or fixating itself on obscure, irrelevant, even trite things. anyway, here's to randomness and pissing on drama.

btw, i dont literally hate people. that was the frustr...nevermind, yes i do!

1. first off, in a previous blog i said that toast with butter and grape jelly was severely underrated. now im saying that twinkies are soooo nauseatingly overrated. its like a sponge with mayonnaise stuffed in it. (did i just use the word nauseatingly??)

2. i lover ginger ale but 'canada dry' is a ridiculous name for a brand. no offense to canadiens ay, just sayin ya know. i mean how ridiculous would a similar drink be if we called it 'american wet' or 'united states damp'? again, just sayin.

3. what was God thinking when he created both snakes and spiders? i mean couldnt he forsee that the crap movies '8 legged freaks' and 'snakes on a plane' would spawn from these creations?

4. we took our kids to this indoor/outdoor waterpark in the dallas area the other day and had a blast. other than getting all kinds of stares from on-lookers in regards to all the tattoos we sport, (all three of our kids were COVERED in those fake stick on tats and my wife and i both have quite a few) we had a blast. one night i was staring at the ceiling, as i often do, thinking about the days events and what all i had to do to keep myself from beating up that jerk kid who tried to push my son bc he couldnt get the inner tube from him as we floated down the lazy river. but thats besides the point, what i was trying to say was that while i thought on all this, i started wondering...what the hell are all those 'bumps' on the ceiling?? we had them on the ceiling of the house i grew up in and i would often make shapes out of those, but never asked the question of just what the hell are they?! if you've never seen them they look like the ceiling has a bad case of the chicken pox or like someone, for whatever reason, decide to stick a crap load of those 'french burnt peanuts candies' on the ceiling and paint over them. if you dont know what french burnt peanuts candies are, google it ya lazy bum.

5. why can i spell the word 'regularly' without problems, but as soon as i try to say it, the word soon sounds like a collection of l' and r's scatteres at will. audibly it sounds like 'regularlaly'. really frustrating to sound like a bumbling six year old when doing radio interviews.

reporter: so sammy hows your offseason going? you work out much?
me the apparent six year old: its been great. ive been working out regularaly, i mean regul,ahem, i mean often.

6. peach cobbler is one of my favorite desserts, but i think im going to call it something else. 'cobbler' doesnt sound very appetizing in my opinion. maybe it should be called 'megan fox'.

7. a wet bar is what?

8. so if uni-brow means a single hilarious block of hair with little to no separation above the eyes, a uni-cycle means a single wheel with little to no relevance to anyone other than circus performers, what the hell does uni-sex mean?? shouldnt the clothing or whatever be called 'bi-sex' clothing?...just sayin

9. are dogs offended by humans morning breath? if so, the nerve.

that'll be all


Kembree said...

Sorry you are having a bad day..sounds like you have some good positive thoughts atleast..

diana b. said...

a wet bar is a place where you can get a canada dry. :)

Deb O said...

hope you are in a better mood :-) the ceiling with the bumps is called stucco, developed by Italians, I think (my fathers trade) so is Baloney, an American version of an Italian sausage from the Bologna region of Italy. I think those white things is lard, yuk,, ciao for now...

Dr. Joe Ford said...

as usual....good stuff.

diana b. said...

long time... no blog. : (

amy (metz) walker said...

I agree with Diana!

lin said...


About Me

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texas, United States
im married to one succulent momma and we have 3 supremo kids. i like corn dogs, star wars, toothbrushes with the grip and there isnt really much more to say of interest about me. well other than the fact that i can moonwalk and count to 10 by 5's.

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